I love autumn

Today I have been happy, I felt energetic. I am still without a job, and just this week got a negative answer from one of the companies I had applied to, but today I am not stuck in desperate mood. I actually planned ahead some projects (thanks to Domestika) and felt overwhelmed that I can actually do something, be creative. My issue though is I am doing too many things, projects at the same time and then it feels nothing is ready or ever will be. This is something I need to work on...

Last week I visited north of Finland, Rovaniemi where my dad lives and where I am from. As no need to go to work I appreciated this free time I have now. Up north the autumn colors are splendid and it was so great to go to forest and pick some red berries. I would love to do this also here at southern Finland, but I am not yet familiar with the great forests we have here. With time I will learn to know my surroundings.

New startings

Yesterday, the 1st of September was my first unemployment day. I felt fine, energetic, delighted to have a free day. The day before my temporary contract in women´s clothing brand NOSH had ended. In a way it was my dream job as it was a Finnish clothing brand, responsible manufacturing made in Europe and its homy style corresponded to my taste as well. It had a great team and I felt fine in it. The situation was sad as I had hoped to continue there and the company also had wished to be able to provide me a new contract, but as the economy is how it is it was not possible this time.

But yesterday I still felt happy and overwhelmed. It was my harvesting day. Weather was splendid, sun was shining, but already with autumn chilly temperature. 

Today I am already a bit blue. Two days ago in my final day at work in the evening I applied to two new positions and I have heard nothing from them. I start to worry whether someone still wants to hire me and how my economical situation will be. This is of course worrying.

I have a huge "to do"-list for this month or months to come. I will be busy and occupied there is no worry for that, but I would love to be part of a good work community, to earn a monthly salary and just keep living normal life. I am afraid not feeling necessary to anyone and starting to feel anxious and not worthy.

I try to keep focusing on good things.

And I love autumn; it is my favorite season! To pick berries and harvest veggies, start to dress warmly with pullovers, start new knitting projects, start to bake. There are good things ahead. 

Let's keep heads up!